You've seen them glaring at you like a deer in the headlights as you scroll through any social media news feed.
The beginning of any new year is filled to the brim and running over with newness and promises. Full of resolutions and good intentions, the masses are set to make a change as the calendar year turns a fresh page.
But what if you're like me and you're just not sure about this new year? And what if you hardly know what to resolutely change because you aren't even sure of the state of everything that is in the interim?
What if you hardly know what the first week of January is going to hold, much less the remaining eleven months?
Because it's easy to make plans and set dates with goals when you feel like you've got a pretty good grip of control on your life, but what about those plans that you just have to surrender simply because you've got more questions than answers at the time?
All of that is what crowded in my mind as I brought in the first day of 2015.
I'm usually pretty good with being laid back and going with the flow, but even for this non type A girl that I am, I still like to have at least some sort of a plan.
So when the only real plan that I could come up with was to open that app that my man challeneged me to...that one that divides out the reading of The Word in a year? Well, that's what I did. Even though I'm not a fan of a checklist, I do like a challenge. Especially when God's Word is involved.
I open the book, thinking I can fill in the box next to Romans chapter eight and I begin to read. I come across a verse that says, "Hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently."
Intrigued, I read on and the beautiful scripture that says, "We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" really starts tugging at my heart.
There in the middle of the book of Romans I find my resolution.
The truth of the matter is that I really don't need a new goal for the year at all.
What I need is the realization that God already knows every intricate detail of this year.
What is my job?
My job is simply to hope.
Hope for what I do not have and hope for what I can not see.
Then when I do not yet see what I have hoped for? I'm to wait patiently for it until indeed I do see it.
My mama bear heart aches with hope for a change in the wellness of my little man child in this new year.
Next week we will walk into a building that has become all too familiar. We will sit and wait for our name to be called.
We will walk down a long hallway and into a sterile room where an ultrasound will be done on his left kidney.
We've done this enough now that I will look at the screen and before the Doctor even confirms whether or not we have had sucess or failure this time, I will know.
I will know if this chapter of our lives is coming to a close or if it indeed has a few more pages, or chapters perhaps, to be written.
Either way it goes, I have this hope....this glorious hope and we will walk into the rest of the new year full of it.
Full of promise, because even if the screen doesn't really say what I think it should,
We know that in all things, ALL THINGS, God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
Whether that looks the way I think it should or not, may our God receive all of the glory and may His perfect will be done. He will work everything out for our good. His word says it and I believe it.
Here's to some HOPE for the new year.
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